Comments on: Women are not Crock Pots

By: shush

shush — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 15:38:46 +0000

Wendy: *lol*
Christian Ranter: Chapman’s book is definitely a worthy investment. The truth is that NO two people are alike, men or women, and you have to find a way to communicate with your spouse. I’ve seen many a man ask a female friend advice on relating to his spouse, only to have the spouse and the friend end up being exact opposites. Communication, communication, and oh, what that thing? Ah, yes, communication!

By: The Christian Ranter

The Christian Ranter — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 18:42:53 +0000

This is a far more complicated subject than comparing Crockpots to Microwaves. First of all, there are many emotional, hormonal, childhood background etc. variables that it’s impossible to create a formula for success that suits everyone.

I read Lehman’s book Sex Begins in the Kitchen. The only thing it got me was more dishes to do and my wife pointing out that I missed a spot in the corner.

What helps though is Chapman’s book about the 5 love languages that can clue you in on what turns your spouses head. For me it is acts of service. I want my wife to be thrilled that I clean the house, but that’s not her language so I don’t hear anything.

For her it is words of affirmation. I struggle in letting her know regularly that I love and appreciate her.

So as you can see, connecting with someone whose language is different from yours can cause problems in the bedroom

By: Wendy

Wendy — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 23:12:47 +0000

Great article! Enjoyed the read! As an aside… I know that women are _also_ visually stimulated! Yehaw!
I have often joked that it is something ‘hairy fat men’ made up to say “oh, women aren’t visually stimulated” so they wouldn’t feel bad for “letting themselves go.”

By: shush

shush — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 12:05:27 +0000

Franc: Hm. I’m sure food has SOMETHING to do with it. It always comes back to the primal drives, which are weirdly interconnected. (You know, possess, eat, dominate, eat, fight, eat… have shelter. Eat.)
e2c: *lol* We could go on for days, if we didn’t have better things to do!
Jeff: Thanks for reading and for the comment!

By: Jeff

Jeff — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 06:41:31 +0000

I left you a comment on Vox.

By: jaklumen

jaklumen — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 03:45:19 +0000

@amberfireinus:

Yeah, I wasn’t complaining about anyone in particular here at all. I’m speaking of other experiences I’ve had, and some really have said or done those things. So far, I don’t think anyone here has, though.

It is a very good point, and a good reminder that women have needs… I like to pamper Cimmy sometimes, do whatever I need to do to treat her right and know she’s appreciated. She has been most gracious and has done the same for me.

I don’t have a WordPress blog, so… granted, I can’t immediately demonstrate such. But… there is evidence at VOX

By: Franc

Franc — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 03:25:13 +0000

…somehow.

By: Franc

Franc — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 03:14:39 +0000

The crock pot/microwave thing is just plain wierd and confirms what I think about hets, It’s all about food.

By: Franc

Franc — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 03:05:32 +0000

To be honest I came to this post out of curiosity with no expectations of it applying to me as a gay man, but the “give and take,” communication, telling your partner what spots to hit where, is universal.
I have been with Russ 19 years and I can’t EVEN tell you how your post is so on the spot.

By: e2c

e2c — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 02:14:37 +0000

“But that analogy is PERFECT! Men hang straight down, and women are needlessly complicated! *lol* (Everyone, I am JOKING! Okay?)”

IKWYM, shush! So many other comparisons suggest themselves (along with interpretations of this one), but I’ll spare you guys!